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Tuesday, 9 May 2017

234. Theresa May, her SS soundbite and my worst Brexit joke…

Here in Britain, Theresa May’s election slogan “Strong Stable” leadership is already jarring like an over-played Eurovision song contest runner up – it’s irritating but you can’t get it out of your head. Plus, Theresa May seems to have injected her Conservative party with Strong Stable Tourette’s.

Following Macron’s resounding victory, the UK is several steps further down the credibility ladder. But in the headache blear of election fatigue for a campaign that only just began – I ask myself why does Theresa May need a ‘strong stable’ when the BREXIT horse has already bolted? (Sorry)

In her blue-stocking way, Theresa May revels in being called a “bloody difficult woman”. She fashions herself as a cross between Margaret Thatcher, a starchy nanny dispensing cod-liver-oil and a human prophylactic against the EU cooperation disease and any chance infection of common sense. In the process, she whips up more jingoism (if you can imagine squeezing any more into the UK) by claiming the EU isn’t going to play nice with us. REALLY!

Following the French victory of common sense and hope over creeping, craven cowardice, none of this now matters. (Thank heavens I didn’t have to re-draft this post following news of the results) Britain and America have placed themselves firmly on the margins of the sensible collaborative forward-facing world. Both are saved from immediate irrelevance only by their unhealthily credit-based monster-consumerism and their military. The main difference is that as soon as Trump is out of office or has his overdue choking fit on a bolus of un-chewed meat or is impeached – America may crawl its slow painful way back to integrity. Britain’s situation is not so reversible.

So, what does May’s strong stable stance mean? Rigid and intransigent or delusional, as Jean Claude Juncker stated?

It sounds as if May is surprised that negotiations will be tough. Like Trump was surprised that sorting healthcare for a nation was complicated.
NB - Jonathan Guber, MIT Economics Professor and architect of Obama’s Affordable Care Act, referencing the way millions of vulnerable Americans are to be thrown off healthcare to fund a gigantic tax cut to the wealthiest, called Trump’s new healthcare bill “The largest pure redistribution from poor to rich…in one bill” the US has ever seen (MSNBC interview with Rachel Maddow May 4th 2017).

But back to UK stupidity…
Theresa May seems surprised that the remaining 27 countries in the EU do not want to serve her tea, cake and whatever else she wants. Many of the electorate – especially those that voted to leave – also seem to be surprised that Britain’s foot stamping is not working as they whip themselves into faux-imperialist fervour. Meanwhile, the imminent threats to all human life - military escalation and environmental decimation - are somewhere below what’s-on-the-telly in terms of them giving a shit. So here I am in my alternative universe – as usual – and I don’t get their don’t-getting – any more than I understand the Remainers who think this is still reversible... (See blog 207 Brexit means Brexit or my letter in The Guardian 5th February 2017)

If that blog post didn’t make it clear – try this doodle.

What did May think was going to happen? What did Boris Johnson, Fascist Farage and the Leave-without-a-plan camp think was going to happen? 

Macron refers to Brexit as a “crime”. It truly is a crime against common sense, the future, and the young and hopeful.

Like I said a couple of blogs ago – to hear Theresa May spout about what she’s going to negotiate from the EU (with her SS leadership) you would think she was pitching to get Britain IN to the EU not OUT.

Recently USA Today reported the Orca whale, Lulu, washed up dead on the coast of the Scottish island of Tiree after being caught in a fishing net. Aberdeen University researchers noted it was the most polychlorinated biphenyl (PCB) polluted carcass they have ever examined. Maybe that’s it - our environment is now so polluted that our brains are poisoned and no one is thinking straight – certainly not here – certainly not in the US where the Environmental Protection Agency is run by someone who was a cheerleader for Fracking and doesn’t believe the planet is in danger (see blog 220)

Guy Verhofstadt – Europe’s Brexit negotiator - is a Macron fan and sees him reforming the EU, a role David Cameron should have assumed rather than allowing Farage and Johnson to dance us drunkenly into the storm while their privilege protects them from any consequences.

On a much more positive and fun note – this weekend is the start of the week-long, huge annual book sale / festival here in Edinburgh raising funds for Christian Aid. Oodles of books of all genres will be on sale at bargain prices. I’ll be doing an author slot on Wed 17th May 1pm with readings from my adult novels, children’s adventure books and my own dystopian novella Zero One Zero Two plus comedy poetry and live Q&A.
If you think the thing that really matters is having a planet humans can live on, get my sci fi dystopian novella Zero One Zero Two

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