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Tuesday, 4 April 2017

229. Article 50 is funny – isn’t it?

Especially from up here in Scotland. I’m surprised we’re not calling it ‘our-tickle-50’. Apologies if you are reading this on translate – that pun won’t work… a bit like BREXIT.

You can almost hear the canned laughter.

Seriously – this is a farce J.B. Priestly would have envied.

Like many voters, the Scots were totally conned. Among other lies, they were told – the ONLY way to stay in Europe was to vote NO in the Independence referendum in 2014.

Then David Cameron – in his Eton schoolboy fog of misplaced confidence, shining inadequacy and poor judgement called an in/out EU referendum. He decided, gambling with Britain’s future was the way to deal with the Empire mob in his own party. And just as when Tony Blair, hanging out of George W Bush’s arse, went into Iraq – there was no post-mess, post-mad-decision PLAN. Not even a few scribbles on the back of an envelope.

Interesting to mention Blair here following the destabilisation of the Middle East. UKIP – the UK Independence Party – exploited the fear of refugees fleeing war, migration and an explosion in (sorry for another pun) global terrorism – to hijack the EU referendum with the blunt, amnesia-inducing instrument of Xenophobia.

Augmenting their lies and racism, the Leave campaign used the opposite arguments they’d advocated in the Scottish referendum, to rattle a poorly informed public.

The Leave campaign won – and then rubbed our noses in it by admitting, the day after the vote, that one of their biggest, loudest lies was – well – a big loud lie - ha. How amusing, how jolly…

Then Farage skipped off to play with Trump. Cameron exited swiftly and without a backward glance.

Now our unelected Prime Minister Theresa May – who was a Remain advocate – is turning out to be the most brittle of Leave practitioners. So, was she a flimsy shit then or is she a flimsy shit now?

And the merry-go-round whirls crazily on to a jangling, painful, discordant tune. Suddenly EU citizens who have been settled here for decades, do not have security. The Prime Minister refuses to exclude them as pawns in her negotiating. And as her hand is so very very weak – pity them. And last week in the madness whipped up by the racists a young asylum seeker was set on by a mob and was beaten nearly to death and ex- Tory leader – Howard started sabre rattling over Gibraltar. All this before negotiations begin.

The new UKIP leader Paul Nuttal, is everything you would expect from that party. Stupid, dishonest, attention seeking, stupid, a fantasist, stupid, boring – oh and did I mention STUPID. Farage’s media gimmick was that he was an ‘ordinary bloke down the pub’ and he was regularly pictured perched on a bar stool with fag and pint. In fact, Farage is a privileged and wealthy ex-stockbroker who went to an exclusive private school where the staff didn’t like him because he was too racist. But Paul Nuttal actually is the wanker down the pub. He is the bloke everyone tries to avoid and who they pretend they haven’t seen if he tries to catch their eye. He is the guy glad-handing anyone who will give him the time of day as he spews his girly, whining, clichéd speeches and re-hashed unoriginal phrases.

Theresa May’s Article 50 pronouncement itself was comedy. There were references to the close union she wants with Europe – the co-operation on security and trade etc. A newly landed Martian could be forgiven for thinking she was pitching to GET IN to the EU.

In this hiatus of crazy, I cannot begin to explain what happened across the pond. Trump - the alpha male – with no alpha and a parody of masculinity – is simply shitting on America like a delinquent baboon. However, here in the UK, it is more obvious what happened. Mediocrity triumphed. From the Prime Minister who is every inch the 6th form head girl who got in because the student everyone wanted got caught sniffing glue behind the bike sheds to a lack-lustre, out of touch public broadcast organisation. Still the BBC is dancing, like an arthritic auntie, trying and failing to be relevant and shuffling three steps behind – well - everything - paid for by everyone!

Apart from the general national mess – there is an important similarity with the US - the nasty people were given huge amounts of free prime-time media coverage which, in the US, has been admitted. Here, UKIP were shamelessly platformed by our public broadcaster the BBC.  Way, way back I wrote about the BBC promoting ‘Hitler lite’ (see blog 111). Well – now the internet – via twitter is finally cottoning on and picking up that UKIP – despite not being able to hold a single seat in Parliament are given endless time on the BBC – including the BBCs flagship political discussion programme - Question Time. It is lower than slap stick farce. The BREXIT / Article 50 show is more garish than a juggling, unicycling, farting clown with a bent neon foghorn.

I mean – come on – I know Trump is no longer funny – but surely Brexit is. And Article 50 is hilarious - isn’t it?


You may also like these related blogs from the archives -

117. Get Those Darkies Back In Their Box
152 Could the Nice People speak Up Please

165 The Penisic Era

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